therapy for men
It can be really hard to be a man today.
In our prevailing culture, men are expected to live by a narrow set of rules. For many guys there is a strict framework about how you can be and how you can live your life. If you don’t follow the rules, your masculinity is questioned.
You can be strong and independent, brave and decisive, you can be stoic.
You can’t ask for help, you can’t express anything you’re feeling (except for anger, anger is OK), and your relationships with others have to follow a strict set of understood guidelines, especially with other guys.
This is an impossible spot to be, because we can’t always be strong, independent, or brave. And sometimes we really, truly need help. And many of us would like relationships that work better in providing us with what we actually need - support, connection, and love.
While some men build a healthy set of coping skills and ways of relating to others that are more workable, a lot of guys find that what they were taught to believe or how to act as men is no longer working or never worked very well. This can show up as depression, anxiety, problems managing anger, or challenges with substances, sex, or other issues.
Therapy can be a space to figure out what’s going on for you, understand yourself and your place in the world, and build skills to reduce struggle, form relationships that actually work, and create a life that feels rich and vital.
anxiety therapy for men
Anxiety in men often goes unrecognized, not because it isn't there, but because it doesn't always look like worry or panic. For many men it shows up as a constant need to stay busy, difficulty switching off, tension in relationships, irritability, or the feeling of running on fumes while still keeping it together on the outside.
I work with men dealing with generalized anxiety, social anxiety, panic, and anxiety that's connected to past experiences or trauma. Using IFS, EMDR and ACT, we work on two levels: building practical skills for managing anxiety now, and addressing what's underneath it so it doesn't keep coming back.
If you've tried managing it on your own and hit a ceiling, therapy can help you get past it.
trauma therapy for men
Many men carry the weight of past experiences such as difficult childhoods, loss, accidents, or other challenging events, without connecting them to how they feel today. While trauma can show up via obvious symptoms such as panic attacks, flashbacks and nightmares, it sometimes doesn't look like what you'd expect. It can show up as emotional numbness, hypervigilance, difficulty trusting, or anxiety that doesn't seem to have an obvious cause.
I'm a Certified EMDR and Level 3 IFS Therapist: both are evidence-based approaches specifically designed for trauma. We can work through what's happened in a structured, manageable way, at a pace that feels right for you.
sex therapy for men
If you struggle with sexual issues, you are not alone. Many of the guys I work with are dealing with performance issues such as erectile dysfunction and premature or delayed ejaculation. I also work with men who are experiencing low or no desire (also known as libido).
A significant part of my work is with guys who are struggling with sexual behaviors that feel out of control (also known as sex or porn addiction).
I also work with men who are trying to understand their sexual identity, who are struggling with relating to others sexually, or who just want to feel healthier about their sexuality.
You and I can work together to improve your sex life. Sex therapy is about both building skills and addressing underlying issues like anxiety that get in the way. It’s about improving how you relate to your sex partners and building a sex life that feels pleasurable and connected.
get started today
I see clients in person in San Francisco and online throughout California, including the Bay Area, Los Angeles, San Diego, and Sacramento. Schedule a free 20-minute video consultation to learn about therapy services and see if we might be a good fit to work together.